Monday, March 31, 2008

Hold on, it's going to be long ride post

1. Phone update: Had to get rid of my oh-so-pretty Pearl. I miss her dearly however the Internet tethering thing didn't work at my house so now I am without Internet and have been since Friday and took my phone back b/c it was pointless to keep her, oh how I miss her.
So..... I got a new phone, let me introduce you to my "new" little friend

LG Scoop
2. Saturday night decided to go out with a friend for a drink or two... Land was at my sisters for the night and The Daddy was out with his brother as well, we were planning on meeting up later on. So we go to my uncles Sports' Bar and have a couple drinks. Well I am not one to "hate" on people however there has been one certain individual that I have never liked, she is what you would consider an individual to be a "psycho", no lie. I haven't talked to her in a long log time and she came up to me at the bar wanting to know why I didn't like her. I have my reasons, as a matter of fact she knows why, not to mention she is a total cocaine addict! Yep that's right, snorts the white powder up her nose... killing herself, but that's besides the point. I tell her to get away from me and to stay away from me, I also give her a few other choice words and then she goes and sits elsewhere, why don't people like her get it? So long story short she got my blood boiling.
3. Here is where the real "stressors" occur. Land came home from an overnight at my sisters house. He loves going there b/c he has so much fun playing with his cousin Spencer who is 3 years older than he is. To no offense to my sister or brother in law but whenever he comes home he is so wound up and kind of naughty, whiny etc and that is only b/c he wants to stay with Spence and play more, they are great with him and he loves them so.
So we are at home and it's early in the afternoon and all Landen is doing is whining and crying and not using his words as he should. We can not ( I don't know what parents can..) understand a single word that comes out of his mouth when he is acting this way, and I know the reason he is having these small break downs..... he needs a nap. So I take him in to lay down with me, he cries and fights it and is trying to break away from me but can't. Finally he lays there and chills, and I fall asleep but he is still awake and goes out by his daddy. Grrr.... this is about 3:00p.m. at this time and the child still has not napped which is never good in our circumstance.
I get up try laying him down again, he finally falls asleep at 3:30p.m. (whew!)
We had to wake him up at 5:30 b/c otherwise he never would've fallen asleep at a decent hour during the night. That was a little rough getting him up but we all got over it and had a nice dinner together.
7:30p.m. I tell his daddy that we need to start putting him to bed earlier than 9:00p.m. b/c he doesn't get enough sleep and is a total grumpasaurus, he questions me as to why but agrees. So we had decided that he will start going to be about 8:00 p.m. every night however last night he would go to bed at 8:30 p.m. b/c he had napped a little later in the day.
7:45p.m. I asked Land who he wants to put him to bed his mommy or his daddy, he doesn't answer me. I ask again, still no answer. I Ask him two more times and by this time my blood is beginning to boil again b/c I hate being ignored, still no answer and THEN his daddy turns the TV off and asks him after me asking all those times! Why did it take so long for him to participate?
This is what happens, Landen and I argue and daddy sits back patiently watching TV or a movie or what have you while I am being the bad guy, so then that is when Landen will say "I want my daddy", boo fricken' hoo.
I hate being the bad guy but this is what happens.... I am arguing with Landen (don't get me wrong I try to chose my battles with him wisely b/c otherwise it is just not worth it!) But then usually Trav and I end up fighting and then I am always in the wrong.
OK that was my VENT session for the day, I just don't want to fail him. I don't want him to resent me. I don't want my child to grow up thinking he can get away with things and think that he doesn't have to respect me. I made an appointment with a Couples Counselor and a Parenting Counselor, I just feel like I'm at my wit's end with how to handle things anymore......
I am not feeling sorry for myself so please don't think that, my heart just feels so heavy and I dont want to fail my child or my relationship.

7 comments:

G24 said...

Sending you a hug :)

Kelly said...

I'm glad that you have the blog available to you to blow off a little bit of steam. I think we all need to vent now and again. It's healthy. Hopefully this will all blow over soon. In the meantime, say a few prayers and take a deep breath.

Angela said...

Oh, Kim! I feel for you! All couples/parents- go through those things at one point of another. But good for you for taking initative! Counseling can be great.

You hang in there- because, you are right, you don't want Landen to think he can get away with things like that. Next time, don't ask him who he wants to put him to bed... you just choose for him ;)

Hugs!

Rachel said...

ur a good mommy...and Land knows that and loves you very much he's just going through a tough stage. i have so been there many times. hang in there mama.

Amanda said...

Children can be quite a challenge, that's for sure! So can relationships! Getting counseling is the right step to take. Good for you for caring so much about your child and your relationship with his Daddy to take that necessary step! I hope it does some good...But in the meantime, feel free to vent to us anytime!

LeslieW. said...

Very cool phone! I love a cool phone too. I have a blackberry curve, it was really complicated at first. Now I am used to it and love it, my hubs got one too. You will get spoiled though...can't go back now! Hope you get the hang of it quickly!

Dena said...

Wowsa - sounds like it was crazy at your house dude - don't worry - land is TWO - that's what they do and from my experience (i listen to my gals) most hubbies are useless - so don't worry - I always think it's funny when annie and i get in a fight - she's FOUR - I am THIRTY FOUR!